vallygalusa's Xanga

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Wed, 16 Nov 2005 21:20:30 GMT

GO HERE

Saturday, November 12, 2005

Sat, 12 Nov 2005 15:25:19 GMT

Two days after my little back procedure and I'm ok. This morning I'm actually feeling near 100%.

Saturday, October 22, 2005

Sat, 22 Oct 2005 07:07:27 GMT

Ewww, I feel sooooooo sick. I wanna go home

Monday, October 17, 2005

Mon, 17 Oct 2005 22:14:23 GMT

Im so over my back!

Monday, October 03, 2005

Mon, 03 Oct 2005 19:10:14 GMT

Party planning hell!!!

Friday, September 30, 2005

Fri, 30 Sep 2005 22:16:53 GMT

Padres game last week...

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Thu, 29 Sep 2005 15:46:33 GMT

So I don't think I've ever been as down about my back as I have been the last few days. When you have 4 different doctors between age 10 and 16, and all of them have no/different answerers about what's wrong with you you can still hold out hope that there is at least a doctor somewhere who has the answers , they may not be what you want to hear but surely anything is better than nothing. Then I found the one doctor willing to help me, willing to draw a conclusion and act upon it even though "this has never been seen in anyone your age"(story of my fucking life). So you go through an excruciating surgery where quite literally they take out a hunk of your bone and tissue on your spinal canal, and life sucks balls for about 3 months after that......then you think thank god all those days of not being able to walk or move your legs are gone.........only a year later the pain and symptoms come back. So you go back to this doctor hoping for another answer and her says.......................

"You know I just don't know what to do anymore, I'm going to send you to a specialist and see if he has any ideas." Mind you he is a spine specialist, he took years to find and get approval to see through gay ass insurance and now...........I have to wait even longer to see a spinal neurologist, where the painful annoying process of "what's wrong with her" starts all over again. the million tests some mild some really shitty, but bottom line......I'm back at square one. No answers just a million more questions. I asked about a a hundred questions when he said he was out of ideas, but it seems like the more questions I ask the more I have but the most prominate one "why me?" I'll never know.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Tue, 20 Sep 2005 06:23:06 GMT

I have never in my life beeen woken up by thunder an lightning. I sleep thru eartquakes. Yet here I am at 1220 wide awake............this is amazing how absolutely baufiful. I havent headrd that rain that hard in a very long time. now i just need someone to cuddle with while it passes......

Monday, September 19, 2005

Mon, 19 Sep 2005 03:27:10 GMT

Goals

to be better in school
to be a better girlfriend
to be a better person
to work hard
to save money
to dream

I am sooo stupidly retardedly in love with Eric Bryan Wolford.....and guess what? He loves me back!

Saturday, September 17, 2005

Sat, 17 Sep 2005 20:05:08 GMT

The Irony of it all is our song still applies and I never thought it would. Blink "untitled"

Get the fuck up she said
Your life is meaningless
It's going nowhere
You're going nowhere

You're just a fuck-up she said
I'll live alone instead
She said you don't care
I know I don't care

I'll never ask permission from you
Fuck off I'm not listening to you
I'm not coming home
I'm never going to come back home

I got too fucked up again
And passed out on the plane
Tried to forget you
I can't forget you

No sleep on this flight
I'll think about the nights
We had to get through
How did we get through?

I'll never ask permission from you
Fuck off I'm not listening to you
I'm not coming home
I'm never going to come back home
I'll run away

Blink

No more tears

So now that it’s over can’t we just say goodbye?
I’d like to move on and make the most of the night
Maybe a kiss before I leave you this way
Your lips are so cold I don’t know what else to say

I never wanted it to end this way my love my darling
Believe me when I say to you in love I think I’m falling

Ozzy

There are no unlockable doors
There are no unwinable wars
There are no unrightable wrongs
Or unsignable songs

There are no unbeatable odds
There are no believable gods
There are no unnameable names
Shall I say it again, yeah

There are no impossible dreams
There are no invisible seams
Each night when the day is through
I don’t ask much

I just want you
I just want you

ozzy